James Taris

HOME / 2008 RICH LISTS / 2007 RICH LISTS / 2006 RICH LISTS / 2005 RICH LISTS

Rich-Bastards.com
The Who's Who of Billionaires

Aussie (Australian) definition of bastard ... "a term of endearment".

James Taris
email: JamesTaris@gmail.com

Welcome to Rich-Bastards.com

MEET THE RICHEST PEOPLE ON THE PLANET
Your Introduction to the world's wealthiest Billionaires

TOP 10
RICH LISTS

Spend a few moments going through these Top 10 Rich Lists and just wonder what the hell you could do with just a fraction of the billions of dollars these guys and gals have.

And if your name is on one of these lists, I'd welcome any how-to-get-rich tips you may like to share with my readers.

James Taris
Founder of Rich-Bastards.com

BILLIONAIRE
JOKES

Before You Meet With God

A billionaire died and went to The Judgment. St. Peter met him at the Gates of Heaven and said, "Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you -- we've looked at your life, and your really didn't do anything particularly good or bad.

We're not at all sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?"

The billionaire thought for a moment and replied, "Yeah, once I was driving along in my ferrari and came upon a woman who was being harassed by a group of bikers. So I pulled over, got out my tire iron, and went up to the leader of the bikers. He was a big, muscular, hairy guy with tattoos all over his body and a ring pierced through his nose. Well, I tore the nose ring out of his nose, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering the woman or they would have to deal with me!"

"I'm impressed," St. Peter responded, "When did this happen?"

"About two minutes ago," came the reply.

Heaven Cafeteria

A billionaire dies and goes to heaven. St. Peter meets him at the Pearly Gates and checks him in.

After he's registered, St. Peter says to him, "Look at the time: you must be hungry! Heaven Cafeteria is serving lunch, why don't you get yourself something to eat?"

The billionaire goes to the cafeteria and notices the long line. He immediately cuts in at the front, only to hear loud protests. "I'm a billionaire" he says, "I'm a busy man, I don't have time to wait in line."

The others say, "You're in heaven now, we're all the same here, get to the back of the line and wait your turn!"

A few weeks later, waiting patiently on line for lunch, the billionaire notices a man come dashing in wearing a 3 piece suit and accompanied by a 6 man entourage. He butts in at the head of the line and no one utters a peep.

"Hey," he says to the guy in front of him, "Who does that guy think he is?" "Oh, that's God," says the guy, "He likes to play billionaire."

Genie With A Catch

A guy found a bottle on the beach. He rubbed it and, sure enough, out popped a genie.

"I will grant you three wishes," said the Genie. "But there's a catch." "What catch?" he asked.

The genie replied, "Every time you make a wish, every politician in the world will receive double what you asked for."

"Well, I can live with that! No problem!" replied the elated man.

"What is your first wish?" asked the Genie. "Well, I've always wanted a Ferrari," he said. POOF! A Ferrari appeared in front of the man. "Now, every politician in the world has two Ferraris," said the genie.

"Next wish?" "I'd love a billion dollars," replied the man. POOF! One billion dollars appeared at his feet. "Now, every politician in the world has two billion dollars," said the genie. "Well, that's okay, as long as I've got my billion," replied the man.

"What is your final wish?" asked the genie. The man thought long and hard, and finally said, "Well, you know, I've always wanted to donate a kidney."

VW v. Rolls Royce

A man from Texas, driving a Volkswagen Beetle, pulls up next to a billionaire in a Rolls Royce at a stop sign. Their windows are open and he yells at the billionaire, "Hey, you got a telephone in that Rolls?"

The billionaire says, "Yes, of course I do."

"I got one too... see?” the Texan says.

"Uh, huh, yes, that's very nice."

"You got a fax machine?" asks the Texan.

"Why, actually, yes, I do."

"I do too! See? It's right here!" brags the Texan.

The light is just about to turn green and the guy in the Volkswagen says, "So, do you have a double bed in back there?"

The billionaire replies, "NO! Do you?"

"Yep, got my double bed right in back here," the Texan replies.

The light turns and the Volkswagen takes off.

Well, the billionaire is not about to be one-upped, so he immediately goes to a customizing shop and orders them to put a double bed in back of his Rolls.

About two weeks later, the job is finally done. He picks up his Rolls and drives all over town looking for the Volkswagen beetle with the Texas plates. Finally, he finds it parked alongside the road, so the billionaire pulls his Rolls up next to it.

The windows on the Volkswagen are all fogged up ...

(it's OK to continue ... it's a clean joke.)

... and he feels somewhat awkward about it, but the billionaire gets out of his newly modified Rolls and taps on the foggy window of the Volkswagen.

The man in the Volkswagen finally opens the window a crack and peeks out.

The billionaire says, "Hey, remember me?"

"Yeah, yeah, I remember you," replies the Texan, "What's up?"

"Check this out...I got a double bed installed in my Rolls."

The Texan exclaims, "YOU GOT ME OUT OF THE SHOWER TO TELL ME THAT!"

CLICK HERE for more Billionaire Jokes

Search this site powered by FreeFind

$

Warren Buffet is the World Richest Man
Bill Gates slipped to third position

March 7, 2008
By Philip Fernando in Seattle for Asian Tribune
Seattle, 07 March, (Asiantribune.com):

The richest man in the world is Warren Buffett of Berkshire Hathaway Inc. USA. Bill Gates co-founder of Microsoft had been the top most billionaire for 13 years is now third in the list. Second to Buffet is Mexico’s techno-Mogul Carlos S Helu. Indian steel entrepreneur Lakshmi Mittal was fourth and one of four Indians in the top ten.

Buffett's wealth grew $10 billion, to about $62 billion, in the 12 months through February, mostly because of a gain in his company's shares, Forbes said Wednesday. Indian steel entrepreneur Lakshmi Mittal was fourth, the richest in Asia.

Brothers Mukesh and Anil Ambani, whose father founded the Reliance Group of companies, were fifth and sixth, and Kushal Pal Singh, who heads property developer DLF Ltd., moved up 54 spots, to eighth.

Bill Gates' fortune rose $2 billion, to $58 billion, but he fell to third on the list behind Mexican telecommunications magnate Carlos Slim, who has an estimated net worth of $60 billion.

Forbes's list shows wealth expanding in emerging markets around the globe, with Russia overtaking Germany as the second-richest country and 70 percent of newcomers coming from Russia, India, China and the U.S. In 2006, half of the top 20 billionaires came from the U.S. This year, there were four Americans. Ikea founder Ingvar Kamprad was seventh with $31 billion, making him the list's top European, while Russia's richest man, Oleg Deripaska, was ninth with $28 billion. Retired German supermarket magnate Karl Albrecht was 10th with $27 billion.

$

Here's something I stumbled across which made me laugh because it seemed so appropriate for this site.

A letter to "Rich Bastards" from a bank!
(From New Scientist, 28 August 1993, Feedback column)

The National Westminster Bank admitted last month that it keeps personal information about its customers-such as their political affiliation-on computer. But now Computer Weekly reveals that a financial institution, sadly unnamed, has gone one better and moved into the realm of personal abuse.

The institution decided to mailshot 2000 of its richest customers, inviting them to buy extra services. One of its computer programmers wrote a program to search through its databases and select its customers automatically. He tested the program with an imaginary customer called Rich Bastard.

Unfortunately, an error resulted in all 2000 letters being addressed "Dear Rich Bastard". The luckless programmer was subsequently sacked.

$

Billionaire News and Tips ...

I must admit that reseaching this information has been very enlightening, and loads of fun. Here's a few things I came up with:

How to Become a Billionaire by H. L. Hunt.

Wealth building habits for kids by John D. Rockerfeller, Jr.

4 Tips (Trumpisms) from Donald Trump.

8 Wealth Building Secrets from J Paul Getty.

Billionaire Revelations (including):

Which billionaire eats Happy Meals at McDonalds?

Which billionaire used to drive a beat up car?

Which billionaire paid $127 million for his London mansion?

The Real Estate Billionaires

Who was the highest paid English celebrity in 2004?

Who are the 40 richest celebrities in the USA under 40?

Hollywood's Richest Celebrities

$

How to Become a Billionaire by H. L. Hunt

When H. L. Hunt was asked what does it take to become a billionaire he said:

1. You must know what you really want.

2. You must know what you are willing to sacrifice to get it. And be willing to do what it takes to accomplish it.

3. You must write it down.

Mr. Hunt in the latter years of his life had a personal income of over 5 million dollars a DAY. (He should know what he was taking about.)

$

Wealth building habits for kids by John D. Rockerfeller, Jr

According to Nelson Rockerfeller, the one time Vice President of the United States, his father John D. Rockerfeller, Jr, gave each of his five sons an allowance "We got 25 cents a week, and had to earn the rest of the money we got."

To earn part of that extra money he raised vegetables and rabbits...

"We always worked. All the boys were required to keep personal daily account books. They were required to give 10 percent of their income to charity, to save 10 percent, and to account for all the rest."

They had to balance their account books every month and to be able to tell what happened to every penny they earned.

(From the book, Kids and Cash
Ken Davis and Tom Taylor, 1979, Oak Tree Publications)

$

4 Tips (Trumpisms) from Donald Trump

Trumpism #1: Making It Big

“I like things big. I always have. To me, it’s very simple: if you’re going to be thinking anyway, you might as well think big.”

Trumpism #2: Accentuate the Negative

“It’s been said that I believe in the power of positive thinking. In fact, I believe in the power of negative thinking. I happen to be very conservative in business. I always go into the deal anticipating the worst. If you plan for the worst – if you can live with the worst – the good will always take care of itself.”

Trumpism #3: Hiding Your Light Under A Bushel

"You can have the most wonderful product in the world, but if people don’t know about it, it’s not going to be worth much.”

Trumpism #4: Show Me the Money

“Don’t believe the critics unless they love your work.”

$

8 Wealth Building Secrets from J Paul Getty

Let the Wealth Building Secrets of one of America's greatest and famous Billionaire, J. Paul Getty inspire you to a great Achievement.

One of the shortcuts to building wealth is to learn from those who have achieved great wealth.

The late Billionaire John Paul Getty was known as one of the greatest wealth builders in American history.

He was kind enough to distill his building wealth rules for anyone who desires to amass wealth like him to follow.

Do you want to be fabulously rich? Then learn from the master wealth builder himself, and follow in his footsteps:

Building Wealth Secret No. 1:

To build wealth today, you must be in your own business.

You may think that the corporate executive with a $100,000 salary is better off than small shop owner, but the executive will be hard-pressed to double his income and taxes will eat up most of any increase.

The simplest peanut vendor has unlimited opportunity to expand his business and his income, and even salesmen, who in most cases are able to write their own paychecks, can control his sale increases himself.

Building Wealth Secret No. 2.

You must have a working knowledge of the business when you start and continue to increase your knowledge of it as you go along.

If you don't know what you're doing when you start, your mistakes will be costly and often unnecessary, and you won't be able to keep up with the technological explosions in any field.

Start smart and stay that way.

Building Wealth Secret No. 3.

You must save money in your personal life and in your business venture as well.

Discipline is the key to saving money. You must develop the will power to deny yourself immediate gratification or the temptation to gamble on the quick buck. Resources will be needed for expansion and should be guarded carefully.

Building Wealth Secret No. 4.

You must take risks, both with your own money or with borrowed money.

Risk-taking is essential to business growth.

Nelson Bunker Hunt is admired for his guts in trying to corner the silver market, not scorned for losing money on this deal.

Some of the richest men have staked their entire fortunes and lost, several times over, before the risk-taking paid off.

Back those risks with good judgment, experience, commitment, And the right support.

Seek advice on risks from the wealthy who still take risks, not friends who dare nothing more than a football bet.

Building Wealth Secret No. 5.

You must not only learn to live with tension, you must seek it out.

Thrive on stress! If it means getting physically fit, having a psychiatric overall or losing 50 pounds before you can handle it, do it.

Once you can learn to thrive on stress, you will not only enjoy it, you will seek it out willingly and enthusiastically and wonder how you could live any other way.

Men of means look at making money as a game which they love to play.

Consider it serious business and you will suffer far more stress than you need or want.

Keep your perspective or your stress level will rocket beyond your control.

Building Wealth Secret No. 6.

Build wealth as a by-product of your business success.

If wealth is your only object in business, you will probably fail.

Wealth is only a benefit of the game. If you win, the money will be there.

If you lose, and you will from time to time if you play long and hard enough, it must have been fun or it was not worth it.

Building Wealth Secret No. 7.

Patience.

This is the greatest business asset. Wait for the right time to make your moves.

Let your business grow naturally, not by pressing your luck.

Building Wealth Secret No. 8.

Diversify at the top.

Once you've made it, you'll understand that any business is limited in the challenges it offers.

You'll want and need other games to play, so you'll look for other ventures to hold your interest.


James Taris web sites

JamesTaris.com
LETS-Linkup.com
Rich-Bastards.com
Honey-BeeBooks.com
TheGloryOfAthens.com
TravelWithoutMoney.com
ChineseArt-ChineseArt.com
ShanghaiPhotoGuide.com
ShockProofMaterial.com
2pups.com

There are
1,125
Billionaires in
56 Countries
in
2008.

(2007 - 946 billionaires)

Rating-Country 
1-USA
469
2-Russia
87
3-Germany
59
4-India
53
5-China
42
6-Turkey
35
7-UK
35
8-Hong Kong
26
9-Canada
25
10-Japan
24
11-Brazil
18
12-Spain
18
13-Australia
14
14-France
14
15-Italy
13
16-Saudi Arabia
13
17-South Korea
12
18-Switzerland
11
19-Mexico
10
20-Sweden
10
21-Israel
9
22-Malaysia
8
23-Taiwan
7
24-Lebanon
7
25-Ukraine
7
26-Ireland
6
27-Kazakhstan
6
28-Poland
6
29-United Arab Emirates
6
30-Indonesia
5
31-Netherlands
5
32-Singapore
5
33-Austria
4
34-Chile
4
35-Egypt
4
36-Greece
4
37-Kuwait
4
38-New Zealand
4
39-Norway
4
40-Portugal
4
41-South Africa
4
42-Thailand
3
43-Belgium
2
44-Colombia
2
45-Cyprus
2
46-Iceland
2
47-Philippines
2
48-Romania
2
49-Venezuela
2
50-Argentina
1
51-Belize
1
52-Czech Republic
1
53-Denmark
1
54-Monaco
1
55-Nigeria
1
56-Oman
1
TOTAL:
1,125

MORE BILLIONAIRE
JOKES

50cents To Heaven

A billionaire died and arrived at the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter asked him, "What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?"

The billionaire thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street."

Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the records, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that it was true. Saint Peter said, "Well , that's fine, but it's not really quite enough to get you into Heaven."

The billionaire said, "Wait, wait! There's more! Three years ago, I also gave a homeless person a quarter." Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who, after a moment, nodded back to affirm that it was true.

Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?" Gabriel gave the billionaire a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter, "Let's give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."

Be Nice To Your Nurse

A billionaire had to spend a couple of days in the hospital. He was a royal pain in the butt to the nurses because he bossed them around just like he did his staff. None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything to do with him.

The head nurse was the only one who could stand up to him. She came into his room and announced, "I have to take your temperature."

After complaining for several minutes, the billionaire finally settled down, crossed his arms and opened his mouth.

"No, I'm sorry, the nurse stated, "but for this reading, I can't use an oral thermometer."

This started another round of complaining, but eventually he rolled over and bared his backside.

After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, the billionaire heard her announce, "I have to get something. Now you stay JUST LIKE THAT until I get back!"

She leaves the door to his room open on her way out. The billionaire curses under his breath as he hears people walking past his door, laughing.

After a half hour, the billionaire's doctor comes into the room.

"What's going on here?" asked the doctor.

Angrily, the billionaire answers, "What's the matter, Doc? Haven't you ever seen someone having their temperature taken?"

After a pause, the doctor confesses, "Yes, but Not with a carnation."

CLICK HERE for more Billionaire Jokes